Friday, February 25, 2011

Overwhelmed and Underqualified

Lately I have been feeling like a terrible Mother.  I just can't seem to get it right with the children.  I can't make them smile, laugh, or be happy for that matter.  In fact I only can seem to make them upset, which in turn makes me upset.
Gosh darn it, parenting is hard!!
Yesterday morning was terrible, and I mean terrible!! If it was not one thing it was another. The stinky, wet socks crusted with crackers that I found at the bottom of someones backpack was the last straw and almost put me over the edge!  I ended throwing them out because they smelled like vomit and I almost did...vomit that is.  GROSS!!!!

The Lord is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love. Psalm 145:8

I long to love my children like our God loves.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13

The afternoon and evening went much better.  I talked with each child individually there was some anger and tears, but that it is o.k.  I encouraged the one child to be open and honest with me about how they were feeling.  They felt betrayed.  I explained that I am ALWAYS on your team and I will ALWAYS go to bat for you and I ALWAYS, ALWAYS have your back.  I gave specific examples of this and explained that the decisions that I make as a parent for them is always in their best interest.  This seemed to help.  I gave them some space. 
We went and got pizza for dinner, there was lots of laughing and talk of our day at school and work.
I edited a paper, helped with math homework, and someone read a book about Smokey the Bear to me.
Showers, prayers, and kisses.

Parenting brings something new everyday. There are really bad days and really good days. I love these two so much and I am so thankful for them.  I'm sure some day I will long to have them here with me.  So for right now, I'm going to hold on tight and enjoy the ride!

Have a wonderful weekend!


A_MOMS_LIFE said...

Right now I am stressed with my two year old, praying a lot for patience. I know I will miss this age so I do want to enjoy it ! Thanks for the reminder of Gods love! :) Have a GREAT weekend!

Leslie said...

Excellent post. Just how I am feeling these days. We CAN do all things through Christ...even survive parenthood!

Nickname unavailable said...

Thanks for this. I have been having the same issues. Zero patience. With 3 kids I feel like I am being bombarded with something at all times. I get something under control and then there's an issue with a different one! said...

not to laugh at your distress... but i can't help myself! we had an almost identical day - incuding the conversation (i said almost exact same words to my upset son)
we even ended with pizza! lol
must be in the air!

i also asked him to #1 come to me and let me know when he starts to feel bad (respectfully)

and #2 pray and ask God to help him with his anger and frustration with siblings instead of blowing up - so that he can be the boy God wants him to be

another day- keep on keepin on!

Lucie said...

Conflicts and kids mad at you is a normal part of the mix... After all, parents do set limits, encourage the kids to be their best selves etc... And then there are also many of those wonderful times. Enjoy the roller coaster!

Amanda said...

OK there really must be something in the air because this week has been horrible. I don't know what is going on but little man has been sobbing on and off at the drop of a hat and isn't listening and is suddenly throwing things??? So confused. I'm hoping it's just a bad week and that this is not a stage.

shana said...

Amen! We've all been there, that's for sure. I feel like I'm there way more often than not -- which is no fun. Hang in there!

Melissa said...

Oh I have a lot of days like that... hang in there - I know just how you feel.

Sue said...

You are right, parenting is the toughest job there is, but you reap great benefits! Hang in there! I'm glad you worked things out with your children. We all have bad days:)

Vivi said...

I often go to bed at night feeling guilty about our day...I was impatient, I didn't teach someone something important, they watched too much tv...the list goes on and on.

A friend once said, "'s the best of times and the worst of times." It's true...nothing higher than the highs, or lower than the lows.

It's so obvious how much you love your kids and what great parents you guys are...little bumps in the road (or vomit-y socks) build some character, right?

Jackie said...

Mine are grown...I miss all the commotion but I'm thrilled to see them all thriving and moving on. yours will take those little things with them, the things you share with them, the feelings you share, being honest and open. Imagine how boring our lives would be if our kids were on their best behavior all the time.
I can tell you're a good mama, God has blessed you with those little ones but he doesnt expect you to do it alone. Glad you have Him on your side.

Lauren said...

This post made me laugh. I especially love the picture on the top. My children are all grown now, and I can say with confidence that the time, love and patience you give your children has eternal rewards! Grat post!

Sarah @ Modern Country Style said...

I have that 'all things...strengthens me' verse on my kitchen cupbaord to remind me, when I am seeing the red mist, that I need some time out to control myself!!

IT is hard being a parent but it sounds to me as though you are doing a super job. Really!


Jill said...

Your post shows the struggles all we mother's have. I appreciate you sharing yours with me. In the end, love prevails. Take care, Rachel.

Jill said...

P.S. I'd love to send you a card!
Jill =)

Holly Ann said...

Thanks for your sweet comment on my blog!! It picked my spirits right up this morning! I love your new blog design! :)

AmyD said...

Wow -- this is very honest and wonderful. I, too, have struggled with this parenting thing. It is very hard. And so very very worth it. But sometimes I feel like I am not getting it right. It helps to read that another mother feels that same frustration too. I am know that I do try my best most days. And that I am human and imperfect. So, I will make mistakes (big ones) but I hope that someday my daughter will remember mostly the good times and have a foundation of love and security to build her life upon. That's all that really matters.

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